Owen Consulting - IT & Web support for Small Businesses

Friday Funny: Funny Pictures

Robert Owen — Fri, 20 Aug 2010 14:23:31 +0000

Happy Friday Everybody!! Hope your week has been one that was completely adequate! But, since this was the first week of school around these parts I’d venture a guess and say there was a tad bit of stress.

Well, this week’s Friday Funny comes to me via e-mail. The sender sent along a load of pictures that he thought would make me laugh. They did, so now I’m gonna share them with you to hopefully prepare for a relaxing weekend.

Have a good weekend!

(just click an image to enlarge)

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Friday Funny: Grandpa

Robert Owen — Fri, 13 Aug 2010 13:00:21 +0000

Hello all,

My Friday Funnies posts have been floundering here of late but, today my Friend Christie over at MiscBytes.com sent me this little ditty and it is a HOOT! So, thanks Christie! You’ve given the Friday Funnies a much needed Jump start!

Have a good Weekend everybody!

Grandpa
A woman in a super market is following a grandfather and his badly behaved 3 year-old grandson.

It’s obvious to her that he has his hands full with the child screaming for sweets in the sweet aisle, biscuits in the biscuit aisle; and for fruit, cereal and pop in the other aisles.

Meanwhile, Gramps is working his way around, saying in a controlled voice, “Easy, William, we won’t be long . . . easy, boy.”

Another outburst, and she hears the granddad calmly say, “It’s okay, William, just a couple more minutes and we’ll be out of here. Hang in there, boy.”

At the checkout, the little terror is throwing items out of the cart, and Gramps says again in a controlled voice, “William, William, relax buddy, don’t get upset. We’ll be home in five minutes; stay cool, William.”

Very impressed, the woman goes outside where the grandfather is loading his groceries and the boy into the car.

She said to the elderly gentleman, “It’s none of my business, but you were amazing in there. I don’t know how you did it. That whole time, you kept your composure, and no matter how loud and disruptive he got, you just calmly kept saying things would be okay. William is very lucky to have you as his grandpa.”

“Thanks, lady,” said the grandfather, “but I’m William … the little bastard’s name is Kevin.”

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Symphony Season Begins!

Robert Owen — Thu, 12 Aug 2010 17:46:01 +0000

The Symphony of the Mountains is kicking off their 2010 – 2011 Season on August 28th, 2010 @ 8:00pm. The concert will be held in the Toy F. Reid Employee Center – Eastman – Kingsport, TN.

Dress up as your favorite movie character and win a great prize! Here is the current press release for the opening concert…

Symphony of the Mountains
“A Night at the Movies”
August 28, 2010, 8pm
Toy F. Reid Employee Center, Eastman, Kingsport

Hollywood is coming to Kingsport on Saturday August 28! Come and enjoy “A Night at the Movies”, the opening concert of the Symphony of the Mountains 2010-11 season. Saturday, August 28, 8:00pm at the Toy F. Reid Employee Center, Eastman, in Kingsport. You will have a memorable experience!

The Symphony of the Mountains under the direction of Cornelia Laemmli will take you on a journey through the biggest blockbuster films; 2001: A Space Odyssey, The Godfather, James Bond, Titanic, Lord of the Rings, Star Wars, Pink Panther and many more. A special treat will be a piece written by the concertmaster of our Youth Orchestra, Benjamin Parks Dawson.

For a truly star-studded evening, come dressed as your favorite movie character for our costume contest. The first prize, donated by KNETIC, is a three day trip for two to Universal Studios in Orlando, including flights from the Tri-Cities airport, three nights at the All Star Resort in Orlando and three day passes to Universal Studios!
Join us after the concert at the Bus Pit (240 E Main St, Kingsport), where celebrity judges will present the prizes for the best costumes at 10:45pm. The increcible local band, Wolf Creek will keep the music playing into the wee hours. Present your Symphony ticket stub at the door of the Bus Pit for free admission.

For tickets and more information visit our website www.smphonyofthemountains.org or call the symphony box office at 423 392 8423. Tickets can also be purchased at the door the night of the performance.

If you’re up for a night of good music then take a drive up to Kingsport. The Symphony of the Mountains is a great local Orchestra.

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Interesting Pay Scale

Robert Owen — Sun, 20 Jun 2010 01:45:41 +0000

Interesting Math adventure.

Today, while having lunch with my parents at Litton’s, Barry Litton (the owner) posed a scenario that I had a hard time wrapping my head around. It was this:

Barry: If a man came to your home and said, “I’d like to work in your yard everyday for the next 31 days. All I ask for is you pay me 1 cent the first day then double it every day after for the next 31 days.” How much do you think you would end up paying?

Me: No idea… I can’t do that much math in my head.

Barry: over Ten Million dollars

Me: *gulp*

So, the more I thought about this the more impossible it sounded… I mean, we’re talking about pennies!! So, here’s the Math. One employee, 31 days of employment, 1 cent first day, doubling everyday after.

Day 1: 1 cent
Day 2: 2 cents
Day 3: 4 cents
Day 4: 8 cents
Day 5: 16 cents
Day 6: 32 cents
Day 7: 64 cents
Day 8: 128 cents = $1.28
Day 9: 256 cents = $2.56
Day 10: 512 cents = $5.12
Day 11: 1024 cents = $10.24
Day 12: 2048 cents = $20.48
Day 13: 4096 cents = $40.96
Day 14: 8192 cents = $81.92
Day 15: 16384 cents = $163.84
Day 16: 32768 cents = $327.68
Day 17: 65536 cents = $655.36
Day 18: 131072 cents = $1,310.72
Day 19: 262144 cents = $2,621.44
Day 20: 524288 cents = $5,242.88
Day 21: 1048576 cents = $10,485.76
Day 22: 2097152 cents = $20,971.52
Day 23: 4194304 cents = $41,943.04
Day 24: 8388608 cents = $83,886.08
Day 25: 16777216 cents = $167,772.16
Day 26: 33554432 cents = $335,544.32
Day 27: 67108864 cents = $671,088.64
Day 28: 134217728 cents = $1,342,177.28
Day 29: 268435456 cents = $2,684,354.56
Day 30: 536870912 cents = $5,368,709.12
Day 31: 1073741824 cents = $10,737,418.24
——————————————–
Total monthly pay: $21,474,836.47

Well over 10 million. So… I guess, this would be a good deal if you could get it! Anyone need an IT guy for 31 days?? Start cheap!

Makes you think twice about getting rid of the penny now, doesn’t it? Lunch was still quite good at Litton’s, even though I was distracted by the above math problem. If you want a good Burger and some interesting math discussions, go see Barry Litton over at Litton’s in Fountain City.

Visit their website: http://www.littonsburgers.com
Follow them on Twitter: @littons

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Create a Shortcut to open in your Alternate Browser

Robert Owen — Sat, 19 Jun 2010 22:57:23 +0000

Here’s a quick and simple “How To” for you. I had this question posed by a client the other day and it made me think. This Client is a fan of FireFox. It is his default browser and tries his best to NEVER use Internet Explorer. But, as is the case with most things, the more you try to keep from using something that’s right when you find out you have to.

This was the case here. He had a vendor’s website that would only work in IE AND he needed to use this website alot so, he had a shortcut on his desktop to get to it. The problem is the Internet Shortcut will open in his Default Browser… Firefox. Now, since he uses IE so infrequently, you would think – just make the website in question the home page and be done with it. But that won’t help if you have more than one shortcut.

So, here we go.

First, right-click on your desktop and select New —> Shortcut
This will open a new Window. Here you need to click “Browse” and Navigate to the folder containing the executable for the browser you are wanting to use.
After selecting the executable you need to add your URL to the end. Make sure and put the URL outside the quotes surrounding the executable and make sure and put a space between the closing quote and the URL.
Next, just give your new shortcut a creative name and click finish.

Now you have a URL Shortcut that will open in your non-default browser.

This doesn’t have to be just for Internet Explorer… This will work for any browser you want used for this particular shortcut. Firefox, Chrome, Opera… whatever.

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Friday Funnies: The Fun will Restart!

Robert Owen — Sat, 15 May 2010 17:14:30 +0000

Hey everybody, sorry for the lack of post over the past month or so… Things have been quite busy around here. This is a Friday Funny… Although this is Saturday, I had good intentions… I saw this video posted on Facebook the other day and couldn’t resist a re-post over here. So, all you Band people should get a big kick out of this!

Pushing Band Candy

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My Latest Upgrade

Robert Owen — Wed, 05 May 2010 15:57:36 +0000

Windows 7 …. Bacon Edition!

Coming to a Frying Pan near You! You know you want it!

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Friday Funny: Cell Phone Games

Robert Owen — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 14:30:19 +0000

Happy Friday! I got a link to this little ditty on Monday. Not a bad funny to start off a new month, eh?

I think, If you’re bored and feel comfortable with all your escape routes, this might be a fun gag to try… Might.

Tom Mabe: Eavesdropping

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Knoxville Wind Symphony Concert

Robert Owen — Mon, 01 Mar 2010 19:09:57 +0000

Just a note to all you music lovers in the Knoxville area. The Knoxville Wind Symphony will be holding a concert this Sunday, March 7, at 4:00 at the Historic Tennessee Theatre. Here’s the News announcement from the KWS website:

Wind Symphony and Youth Wind Ensemble will Blow You Away!

Batten Down the Hatches: March will begin with quite a bit of WIND in the Tennessee Theatre.

At 4 pm on Sunday, March 7 the Knoxville Wind Symphony and East Tennessee Youth Wind Ensemble will perform concerts in the Tennessee Theatre, as well as a special portion of the concert featuring a combined wind orchestra over 100 strong.

The concert will feature a work by local composer & horn player W. Mark Harrell entitled Fanfare for the Lord Lieutenant.

Concluding the concert, the combined forces will perform Mark Camphouse’s A Movement for Rosa, a work built around the hymn “We Shall Overcome” and composed in 1992 in honor of the now-late civil rights heroine Rosa Parks.

Check out the Wind Symphony’s website “http://www.knoxvillewindsymphony.org” for ticket information

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Scammers: They really need to try something new

Robert Owen — Tue, 16 Feb 2010 14:15:05 +0000

Happy Tuesday !!! Unless you are not reading this on a Tuesday. In which case I would say, “ Happy ________day!!” So, this morning I opened up my e-mail and was treated to another … (*dum dum duuummm*) E-mail, scam attempt!!! (I feel like there should be lightning strikes and thunder when I say that)

Not that I want anyone to get “taken in” by these foul creatures, I just think they need to have a little more ingenuity… A little more creativity… COME UP WITH SOMETHING NEW! You’re boring us already!!

But, in case that there are others out there who receive the e-mail I got and are “unsure” of its validity… Then let me assure you that what you read below is A SCAM! Delete this and go about your day. Go to your local Panera Bread and have a cup of coffee and rejoice that you were not suckered today. Hey, you could even treat yourself to one of their tasty pastries!

UNITED NATION (UN)
DEBT RECONCILIATION DEPARTMENT.
GENEVA-SWITZERLAND.
Our Ref: UN-0XX2/987/2010
Dear Sir/Madam,

EUROPEEAN UNION, WORLD BANK, UNITED NATION ORGANIZATION OFFICIAL APPROVAL PAYMENT VALUED $8.3M

The British Prime Minister in conjunction with EUROPEEAN UNION, WORLD BANK, UNITED NATIONS ORGANIZATION do hereby give this irrevocable approval order with Release Code: GNC/3480/02/00 in your favour for your Inheritance/contract entitlement/award winning payment with the UNITED NATIONS to your nominated bank account.

Now your new Payment, United Nations Approval No; UN5685P, White House Approved No: WH44CV, Reference No.-35460021, Allocation No: 674632 Password No: 339331, Pin Code No: 55674 and your Certificate of Merit Payment No: 103, Released Code No: Be
appeared the next on the list of our outstanding beneficiaries to received payment at the Beginning of this banking season. SO contact: MR. PETER JEFFERSON on his contact Direct email: mrpeterjefferson@aol.com or by Phone +44 7024060524 for the immediate release of your contract/inheritance/Award Winning claim Be informed that you are not allowed to correspond with any person or office anymore, You are required to send bellow Information for your transfer.

1) YOUR FULL NAME:
2) ADDRESS, CITY, STATE AND COUNTRY.
3) PHONE, FAX AND MOBILE
4) COMPANY NAME (IF ANY) POSITION AND ADDRESS
5) BANK DETAILS
6) PROFESSION, AGE AND MARITAL STATUS
7) COPY OF YOUR INT’L PASSPORT/DRIVERS LICENSE.

NOTE: YOUR PERSONAL CONTACT/COMMUNICATION CODE WITH CITI BANK IS (511), YOU ARE ADVICE TO SEND YOUR FULL BANKING INFORMATION TO THE CITI BANK OF LONDON THROUGH THE OFFICE OF INTERNATIONAL REMMITTANCE DIRECTOR HEADED BY MR. PETER JEFFERSON AND MAKE SURE YOU SPEAK WITH HIM, WITH YOUR NEW PAYMENT CODE FOR THE RELEASE OF YOUR PAYMENT AND SEND HIM ALL YOUR BANKING INFORMATION NOW. Regard. Senate CONTACT CODE (511) OFFICER: MR. PETER JEFFERSON.

Best regards

SIR GEORGE GRAHAM.
DEBT RECONCILIATION DEPARTMENT.
UNITED NATIONS AND EUROPEEAN UNION.

As un-creative as they are being, they should just go ahead and sign this “Best regards, Dirty Scammer“ It would only make it slightly more obvious.

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