• Horn Player – Computer Dude – Gig Pig …
  • Home
  • About
  • Blog
  • Services
  • Contact
  • Webmail
  • Terms

Robert A. Owen - Musician - Technology Leader

Music, Technology, Rants and Funnies - Randomness at its best!

  • Blog
  • Internet
    • IIS 6
    • IIS 7.5
    • Javascript
    • Web Design
      • WordPress
      • Coldfusion
  • Support
    • MicroSoft
      • Powershell
      • Surface
      • Windows10
      • Zune
    • PC-Care
    • Software
    • Virus
      • Email Scam
    • Vista Quest
    • Windows 7
  • Pictures
    • Instagram
  • Music
  • Friday Funnies
  • General
    • CoWorking
    • Gadgets
    • Politico
    • Random – TidBit
    • Rant
    • Review
    • Site of the Week
    • Useless
    • Xbox
      • Games
You are here: Home / Friday Funnies / Friday Funny: A couple of Quick Ones

Friday Funny: A couple of Quick Ones

September 25, 2009 By Robert Owen

Happy Friday Everyone!!!

devil-smileIt’s been a rough week… or two.  That’s why you’ve only seen the Friday Funny posts up.  It’s  been a bit busy around here… cleaning up some messes and trying to keep my head above water.  (I really should make better use of the “Schedule Post” feature)   At any rate,  I’m really glad it’s Friday!

Today’s set of little ditties came to me via my e-mail.  (my friends seem to have no end to their leisure time while at work!)  These are short so I stuck the three of them on one page.  You know, so it seems like you’re getting you moneys worth! 🙂  At any rate,  here a a few “quick ones” to help give you a chuckle as you end your work week.


A Really Bad Day

There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour.   Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down.

The poor man starts crying.  The truck driver says, “Come on man,  I was just joking.  Here, I’ll buy you another drink.  I just can’t stand to see a man cry.”

“No, it’s not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office.  My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen.  The police said that they can do nothing.  I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there.  The cab driver just drives away.”   “I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener.

I leave home, and come to this bar.   And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison.”

Next:::

Blonde paint job

A blonde,  wanting to earn some money,  decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood.  She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.

“Well, you can paint my porch.  How much will you charge?”

The blonde said, “How about 50 dollars?”

The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man’s wife,  inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband,  “Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?

” The man replied, “She should.  She was standing on the porch.”  A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.  “You’re finished already?” he asked.  “Yes,”  the blonde answered, “and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats.  “Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50.  “And by the way,”  the blonde added, “that’s not a Porch, it’s a Ferrari.”

Next:::

Billing

A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party.  Their conversation was constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments and asking the doctor for free medical advice.   After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asked the lawyer, “What do you do to stop people from asking you for legal advice when you’re out of the office?”

“I give it to them,” replied the lawyer, “and then I send them a bill.”

The doctor was shocked, but agreed to give it a try.  The next day, still feeling slightly guilty, the doctor prepared the bills.  When he went to place them in his mailbox, he found a bill from the lawyer.

© 2009, Robert Owen. All rights reserved.

Related posts:

Default ThumbnailFriday Funny: Things you probably shouldn’t do Default ThumbnailFriday Funny: When Nature Calls Default ThumbnailFriday Funny: Cell Phone Games Default ThumbnailLarge Hadron Collider

Filed Under: Friday Funnies Tagged With: Bad Day, Blonde, Day, doctor, drink, driver, driver steps, Friday, Friday Funnies, Happy Friday, head above water, home, lawyer, man, man cry, paint job, porch, two coats, wealthy neighborhood

Robert Owen A Horn Player turned salesman, turned Computer Consultant & Horn Player, Turn Network Engineer & Horn Player, Now Technology leader & Musician.... Well, How about a Horn player who does a lot of other stuff? More about me. FacebookInstagramLinkedInTwitter

To Stay up-to-date on all of my crazy Ramblings, enter your e-mail address below.

You'll be amazed!

Recent Posts…

  • The Great Tab Debate: A Conversation with My AI Friend, Tabitha
  • What If? – Gig Edition
  • Feedback – two way street
  • Snow-pocalypse… and Cold
  • Snow-pocalypse 2025 – part 6

Recent Comments

  • David Gray on Create a Shortcut to open in your Alternate BrowserTwelve years on, this tip remains useful. Though I…
  • Sue K on Use the Snipping Tool to Capture MenusThanks you so much! I could never figure out how t…
  • aa on Increase IIS File Upload LimitsSuperb Robert..after wasting 2 days..this is perfe…
  • León on Windows 7 error 86Funciono para Windows 7 , también descubrí que la…
  • Nicole Larkin on Use the Snipping Tool to Capture MenusNine years later and your post is still helpful. T…

[footer_backtotop]
Content Copyright © 2025 OWEN CONSULTING · All Rights Reserved · Log in